I’ve been dreaming like crazy lately, well, I always did, but sometimes it gets really active in there at night. Last night I was also dreaming about images, not just the usual surreal “movies” where I’m not even Pia and the places I visit don’t exist IRL. I’ve often complained that if I had half the imagination when I’m awake I’d have 20 books worth of material as well as a dozen movies.

Unfortunately I can’t remember the images, but it was definitely about art/painting. Lots of white with little bright splashes of colour. I’ve dreamt about art before, but not all that often, once I did an exhibition of paintings that MOVED – and no, not computer screens. So, usually it’s stuff I would not be able to recreate when I’m awake.

But…. when you think of it – it’s still MY imagination that is creating these dreams, both the stories and the images. So not all of it is rational, but the degree of creativity surely exists in there in my subconscious. If only I could open the door wider.

Maybe it’s just a matter of my excessive brain chatter getting in the way. Maybe something else is holding me back, I haven’t been able to figure this out yet. I really, really would like to. Just give me access to the raw data and I’ll know how to shape and organize it into coherent form I’m sure! Wow, then I’d be on a roll….

Meditation hasn’t yielded anything yet. Nor dream journaling, it’s too hard to explain in ordinary language. As I said, surreal. I know how it feels to be “in the flow”, but I can’t seem to call it forth, I have to wait for it to happen, which is very frustrating. And once you’re frustrated, nothing is dead sure to be happening!

And before you say anything, yes, I did try to capture those fading colour impressions from the dream on paper. But – meh. I think too much. Thinking is great if you have your motif all planned out. With abstracts? Not so much. Even tried lefthanded. Maybe I should start drinking – I wonder what my abstracts would look like after a bottle of bubbles? 😉 (Most likely I’ll fall asleep. I’m such a partygirl. Not.)

Sometimes dreams do have answers though, or so it seems. The night after I wrote last Tuesday’s post I dreamt the solution to some of my questions – however, as soon as I became aware enough to get up and write, it was gone, I only remembered that is was a two step process. That is another problem with too detailed and long dreams, important stuff happens in the middle of them but only the last one is clear (if you’re lucky) when you wake up. I’m pretty sure I’m not supposed to take up horse archery… (it would be fun, but needs, wants, number of holes in my head etc.)

It appears I have to develop a habit of waking up faster. 😉 Ack, old age calling…

So, do any of you use dreams in painting or writing, or is it all just nonsense? All the absurd stuff clearly belongs in the shadows I think, but surely the richness of imagination belongs on the other side too?

I think I’d particularly be interested in the writing aspect myself, because visually I respond more to other things. I’m playing with another “right-brain” technique at the moment, which I read about a while ago, but more on that later. The answer it gave me to this particular question was, however, just as surreal as my actual dreams (literally: “you can try fetch milk daydream on every summer”) So maybe it is so – dreams are dreams and awake is awake, and perhaps they meet at dawn, but only to catch a glimpse of each other.

At least I rarely suffer from sleep paralysis these days, because THAT is just seriously annoying! All the articles say it lasts a few seconds or minutes, but what it feels like is sometimes hours. And yes, I can remember everything, and no, it’s not interesting to write about. Just plain spooky and repetitive.

And I know many of my posts at the moment are about thinking, not doing. I am in fact also doing, I just don’t have anything I’d like to show just yet. Will I ever? No promises… I enjoy the actual process of writing and I want more of that, whether anybody ends up reading it is actually secondary. But it still has to be interesting enough to keep at least my own attention. 😉 (let’s see how many are with me this far)

It seems nature also has a hard time waking up this year, cold, brown, shabby, miserable. No real signs that juices are rising or buds ready to explode, everything  on hold. Hares not playing, no birdies singing to each other, just chirping their heads off for food whenever somebody opens a door or window. It might be wise to just go with it, stay dormant and slow while it lasts, not push ahead and get burnt by the late frost as a result….